http://magazine.windingroad.com/windingroad/200710web/?folio=13

The Audi R8 is the coolest car to come along since the Porsche 928, just as the Porsche 928 was the coolest car to come along since the Porsche 911. The Italians—the ones who yet survive in the car business—have never been able to duplicate the portfolio of performance and practicality that is a Porsche, try as they might.

But along comes Audi and first shot out the box they do a truly great, truly irresistible two-seater coupe that makes the Ferrari 599 look like a poseur.

Perhaps the thing I love most about the R8 is its haughty disregard for iDrive, and shift paddles (which are optionally available), and redundant ignition switches, and all the other wet-dream technologies the Germans seem to love so much.

I was told that when the R8 was unveiled for the dealers, the Europeans were dazzled by the contrasting bright-metal accent on the rear quarter panel, while the Americans immediately began to hem and haw and wonder if they could get the car in monochrome without its startling trademark chromium flash. Americans are probably already asking if the LED string that outlines the R8’s grille and headlamps can be removed.

Martin Swig, our favorite automotive wise man, took one look and blurted, “Leave it to Audi to shake things up! With one stroke of the pencil they gave the car a face that’s even more distinctive in the dark than it is in daylight! It’s genius!” As Mr. H. L. Mencken might have said, “Nobody ever lost money underestimating the taste of America’s automobile dealers.” Remember, these are the same guys who rejected the original checkerboard upholstery in the Porsche 928 when they were VW/Porsche/Audi dealers way back when.

In our issue Number 17 I canvassed our staff for their nominations of Ford Motor Company products that might surprise you with their general goodness and overall acceptability. The final tally listed Ford Edge CUV; Ford Escape Hybrid/Mercury Mariner Hybrid; Ford Expedition EL; Ford F-150 pickup; Ford Focus ST; Ford Fusion/Mercury Milan; Ford Mustang GT and Shelby GT500.

Not long after that, our friends at J.D. Power came out with a ringing declaration that Ford’s latest offerings had indeed improved dramatically, and supported that statement with a list of better Ford products that was nearly an overlay of ours.

We were very pleased to receive some support from J.D. Power, because J.D. Power, more than any other single entity, has held the industry’s feet to the fire on issues like product quality and customer satisfaction, and, in so doing, has been to a large degree responsible for the improvements we’ve seen throughout the last ten years. It makes us feel good to be seen in that sort of company.

Ford is now trying to do something unprecedented in our experience. We all know about people trying to buy back their virginity. Ford, interestingly enough, is trying to sell a bunch of stuff to at least create a veneer of virginity, even if it wouldn’t stand up to any of the grisly tests favored by our Muslim friends.

Aston Martin is gone. Jaguar and Land Rover are on the hot corner of the used car lot with dollar signs and inducements to buy whitewashed on their windshields and their flanks. Only Volvo remains to represent the soon-to-expire Premier Automotive Group, or “Pag” as it was lovingly known. (“Here Pag! Here Pag! Down Pag! Bad Pag!”) As lovely as it is, Volvo has neither the content nor the price point to support something as lofty as a “Premier Automotive Group.” But Volvo is a dear friend of ours who made it the hard way. No silver spoons or lucky sperm for these guys.

The Ford Motor Company’s takeover, rationalization, and integration of Jaguar was a textbook example of enlightened, sensitive management working on opposite sides of a very wide ocean. Somehow, Land Rover was just the opposite, the red-headed stepchild who never learned or forgot anything.

When the present Range Rover was introduced to the press at a grueling off-road site in Scotland, the Range Rover people were able to produce Great Britain’s Prince Andrew, whose special interest is that country’s international trade posture. He was a lively conversationalist and he asked some good questions. When he asked me how to best resurrect the British automobile industry, I told him to commission a broad study that would examine and explain how Ford had approached the resurrection of Jaguar, and consider that business model for future operations of that kind. If he remembers his question and my answer, His Highness must look at Jaguar trembling on the brink of the Indescribable Awful (again) and wonder what the hell I was smoking.

The Jaguar is a wonderful car. It has done well in just about every measure of quality improvement and owner satisfaction in the past few years. It is a perfect alternative to a Mercedes-Benz S-class or a BMW 7-series because it offers a clear choice. It reflects a totally different developmental mindset than the German and Japanese competition, and it is a peck of fun for the properly motivated driver.

Land Rover has other problems. There’s a very nice selection of SUVs out there that solved most of their quality and reliability problems before they were delivered to their owners. Nobody loves the Range Rover more than I do, but I have learned over the last twenty years that every glorious day spent off-roading in the Rockies, or the Tyrol, or the Andes, or the public off-road park fifty miles north of your house, might be offset by three or four hours at the side of some Interstate awaiting the arrival of the local dealer’s flatbed truck.

Magazine Issue: Winding Road Issue 25